The 'Male Brain': So that explains it
By Dr. Louann Brizendine
Hot Red Head Dr. Louann Brizendine (I cropped her bosom to avoid falling into a Man Trance.)(CNN) -- Although women the world over have been doing it for centuries, we can't really blame a guy for being a guy. Thank you Saint Louann Brizendine! And this is especially true now that we know that the male and female brains have some profound differences. Men have known this since forever; we have bigger heads, ergo bigger brains. Duh!
Our brains are mostly alike. We are the same species, after all. I’m not convinced this is true. But the differences can sometimes make it seem like we are worlds apart.
The "defend your turf" area -- dorsal premammillary nucleus (this sounds like a female organ if you ask me) -- is larger in the male brain and contains special circuits to detect territorial challenges by other males. And his amygdala, the alarm system for threats, fear and danger is also larger in men (Men often fight over whose amygdala is bigger). These brain differences make men more alert than women to potential turf threats.
Meanwhile, the "I feel what you feel" part of the brain -- mirror-neuron system -- is larger and more active in the female brain. So women can naturally get in sync with others' emotions by reading facial expressions, interpreting tone of voice and other nonverbal emotional cues. This is perhaps the cruelest fraud perpetuated by Mother Nature (a woman, of course). She allows humankind to develop highly complex languages but then sneaks the old mirror-neuron system into the female brain while men were out hunting or gathering or something. So as men attempt to communicate with uniquely human sounds which form arbitrary auditory symbols that we as social animals agree to communicate with, women are looking at our faces and our posture and completely ignoring the words which are the product of millions of years of evolution.
Perhaps the biggest difference between the male and female brain is that men have a sexual pursuit area that is 2.5 times larger than the one in the female brain. I question this assertion. Remove the decimal point and I might agree. And what’s the scientific name for this part of the brain? Grabthegluteous? Not only that, but beginning in their teens, they produce 200 to 250 percent more testosterone than they did during pre-adolescence.
If testosterone were beer, a 9-year-old boy would be getting the equivalent of a cup a day. But a 15-year-old would be getting the equivalent of two gallons a day. OMG. Was she spying on me? This fuels their sexual engines (Ha! Testosterone is the Gasoline for the Grabthegluteous!) and makes it impossible for them to stop thinking about female body parts and sex. I think it’s time women embrace their female body parts as much as men embrace them.
And so begins the 'Man Trance'
All that testosterone drives the "Man Trance"-- that glazed-eye look a man gets when he sees breasts (or scientifically, Peepatpectoralust). As a woman who was among the ranks of the early feminists, I wish I could say that men can stop themselves from entering this trance. But the truth is, they can't. Here comes the long-winded non sequitur. During a spirited lunch time discussion with coworkers (2 male, 2 female), the long term effects of acknowledging the existence of the “Man Trance” were discussed. The men initially saw this as a positive and revolutionary step for the advancement of inter-gender communication. Finally, women would comprehend us, thus eliminating all the heartburn and headache associated with trying to make women understand; but of course, it took a woman to point out the potential pitfalls of such a development. Our own brains can be used against us! She suggested that all a woman has to do to gain political, social and economic power over a man is approach him and stick out her boobs, instantly inducing a “Man Trance,” rendering the male completely helpless. Rather than being seen as a demeaning and objectifying gesture, the boob attack would become the ultimate weapon in turning the world on its head by allowing women to gain control of the Universe. Let me tell you, this did not sound very appealing to us guys! Their visual brain circuits are always on the lookout for fertile mates. Whether or not they intend to pursue a visual enticement, they have to check out the goods. Ha! I love it. Guys, next time you get caught checking out the goods, your response should be, “Sorry, my visual brain circuits were pursuing visual enticement.” You’ll still probably get slapped, but it’s worth a try.
To a man, this is the most natural response in the world, so he's dismayed by how betrayed his wife or girlfriend feels when she sees him eyeing another woman. I did not write this - a highly educated woman did. Men look at attractive women the way we look at pretty butterflies. They catch the male brain's attention for a second, but then they flit out of his mind. Five minutes later (try 5 hours!), while we're still fuming, he's deciding whether he wants ribs or chicken breast for dinner. He, if married for less than 5 years, asks us, "What's wrong?" We say, "Nothing." He shrugs and turns on the TV. We smolder and fear that he'll leave us for another woman. I had no idea that really worked!
Men look at attractive women the way women look at pretty butterflies. Thanks for another great argument, Louann. Next time your spouse or girlfriend starts smoldering because you were looking at pretty butterflies, tell her, “No need to worry, darling, when’s the last time I had sex with a butterfly?” Not surprisingly, the different objectives that men and women have in mating games put us on opposing teams -- at least at first. The female brain is driven to seek security and reliability ($$$) in a potential mate before she has sex. But a male brain is fueled by booze to mate and mate again (so the Mormons had it right all along!). Until, that is, he mates for life. No, she must be talking about Swans.
Despite stereotypes to the contrary, the male brain can fall in love just as hard and fast as the female brain, and maybe more so. When he meets and sets his sights on capturing "the one," mating with her becomes his prime directive. And when he succeeds (he moves on to “number two, and so on and so forth), his brain makes an indelible imprint of her. Lust and love collide and he's hooked.
The 'Doting Daddy Brain'
A man in hot pursuit of a mate doesn't even remotely resemble a devoted, doting daddy. But that's what his future holds. Don’t tell us that! When his mate becomes pregnant, she'll emit pheromones that will waft into his nostrils, stimulating his brain to make more of a hormone called prolactin. Her pheromones will also cause his testosterone production to drop by 30 percent. Guys, we need to lobby the Pharmaceutical Industry to develop an antidote to prolactin!!!!!! These hormonal changes make him more likely to help with the baby. They also change his perceptual circuitry (I already have booze to do this, why do I need prolactin?), increasing his ability to hear a baby cry, something many men can't do very well before their wives are pregnant. And with good reason!!
And a word to the wise for all the young mothers who are reluctant to let your husbands hold and care for your newborn. The more hands-on care a father gives his infant, the more his brain aligns with the role of fatherhood. So, hand over the baby. AAARRGGGHHHHHHH!!
His emotions run deep
Although men have earned the reputation for being more stoic than women, they actually have stronger emotional reactions than we do. They just don't show it very often. She lies! How could she possibly know this? She’s a woman!!
The male brain can fall in love just as hard and fast as the female brain, and maybe more so.
Studies of men's faces show that the male brains initial emotional reaction can be stronger than the female brain's. But within 2.5 seconds, he changes his face to hide the emotion, or even reverse it. The repeated practice of hiding his emotions gives men the classic poker face. Wrong, wrong, wrong on this one Louann. These behaviors are performed by men to make women think that men have deep feelings. I can assure you that those 2.5 seconds are spent thinking about visual enticement.
It's his poker face and his analytical response to personal problems that can put him in the doghouse. Correction. Any act on his part, be it trivial or innocuous, can get him in the doghouse; it’s all dependent on the mood of his woman. She's crying as she talks about what's wrong with the relationship, and instead of hugging her, his mind is racing to find a way to resolve the problem as soon as possible. Well, she got this half right. His mind is racing… to figure out a way to end the conversation ASAFP so that it can get back to thinking about what it should be thinking about – visual enticement. With practice and because of the way their brains are wired, men use their analytical brain structures, not their emotional ones, to find a solution.
They enjoy this advantage, but women often take affront to it. Why do women always feel affronted when men enjoy an advantage over them?? When you're telling your husband your problem and he tries to solve it instead of hearing you out, you may think he's being insensitive. But that's not what's going on in his brain. He's working to solve the problem so he can (end the conversation ASAFP) relieve your pain as quickly as possible. Not because he doesn't care or doesn't want to listen, but because he loves you. Yeah, that’s it sweetie.
'Lovable Grandpas' and 'Grumpy Old Men'
As men age, the male brain hormones change and the male brain and body goes into the stage of life called andropause. The king of male hormones -- testosterone -- goes down and the queen of female hormones -- estrogen -- goes up. Lies, lies and more lies!! She failed to mention ‘Dirty Old Men’ who are no different from young men if you discount the age difference. Whether Grandpa is your kids' hero or the grouch they hate to visit depends a lot on how he handles these hormonal changes. For example, if his testosterone levels drop to an abnormally low level, he can feel tired, irritable and even depressed – in other words, like a woman!. Some men in this condition seek hormone replacement therapy and others (real men) find relief in exercise, more frequent sex, and spending more time with other people.
· Whether Grandpa is your kids' hero or the grouch they hate to visit depends a lot on how he handles these hormonal changes.
The grandpa that kids can't wait to see is the one who's feeling the effects of the hormone oxytocin, often called the "cuddle hormone." I’m pretty sure oxytocin is found in beer. He's fun and playful and likes to hear what his grandchildren have to say. He's much more patient with your children than he was with you, when you were growing up. Everyone knows it’s easier to be patient with kids you can send away at the end of a long day without any legal repercussions. The love circuits of the mature male brain can be hijacked by his grandkids, even more than they were by his own children. That just sounds so wrong.
The 'Lonely Hearts Club'
Not only is the mature male (oxymoron) brain more receptive to closer bonds, but it's also more sensitive to loneliness. Nobody thrives when they're lonely, but it seems to take a major toll on older men. Sixty-five percent of divorces in couples over the age of 60 are initiated by women, leaving their husbands shell-shocked and devastated. This is the untold story about why middle aged men divorce their wives to be with younger women – they know what’s coming once they hit sixty so they’re simply making a preemptive strike.
Once his wife leaves, unless he makes a point of socializing more with other people, his brain stops getting the social workout it needs to make him feel good about himself. Simply not true. He still has the right to purchase alcohol and his two hands. If he becomes a loner, his social-approval circuits don't get activated. In brain scan studies of older males researchers have found that the brain's pleasure and reward areas, the VTA and the NAC, remain more active in men who are social. So don't begrudge the divorcee or the new widower some socializing and seeking female companionship. Finally some good advice again.
The bottom line
The male human brain is the best learning machine on the planet and male human beings are capable of making major changes in our lives. But there are some things that the male brain and female brain are not likely to change anytime soon. And it makes more sense to deal with these brain realities, than to argue with them or ignoring them.
The best advice I have for women is make peace with the male brain. Let men be men. Hallelujah Sister. Amen to that!
Believe The Captain when he exhorts: Men – prepare to do battle! Women – take out your weapons!
Yours…Los-ing…the…bat-tle…
Our brains are mostly alike. We are the same species, after all. I’m not convinced this is true. But the differences can sometimes make it seem like we are worlds apart.
The "defend your turf" area -- dorsal premammillary nucleus (this sounds like a female organ if you ask me) -- is larger in the male brain and contains special circuits to detect territorial challenges by other males. And his amygdala, the alarm system for threats, fear and danger is also larger in men (Men often fight over whose amygdala is bigger). These brain differences make men more alert than women to potential turf threats.
Meanwhile, the "I feel what you feel" part of the brain -- mirror-neuron system -- is larger and more active in the female brain. So women can naturally get in sync with others' emotions by reading facial expressions, interpreting tone of voice and other nonverbal emotional cues. This is perhaps the cruelest fraud perpetuated by Mother Nature (a woman, of course). She allows humankind to develop highly complex languages but then sneaks the old mirror-neuron system into the female brain while men were out hunting or gathering or something. So as men attempt to communicate with uniquely human sounds which form arbitrary auditory symbols that we as social animals agree to communicate with, women are looking at our faces and our posture and completely ignoring the words which are the product of millions of years of evolution.
Perhaps the biggest difference between the male and female brain is that men have a sexual pursuit area that is 2.5 times larger than the one in the female brain. I question this assertion. Remove the decimal point and I might agree. And what’s the scientific name for this part of the brain? Grabthegluteous? Not only that, but beginning in their teens, they produce 200 to 250 percent more testosterone than they did during pre-adolescence.
If testosterone were beer, a 9-year-old boy would be getting the equivalent of a cup a day. But a 15-year-old would be getting the equivalent of two gallons a day. OMG. Was she spying on me? This fuels their sexual engines (Ha! Testosterone is the Gasoline for the Grabthegluteous!) and makes it impossible for them to stop thinking about female body parts and sex. I think it’s time women embrace their female body parts as much as men embrace them.
And so begins the 'Man Trance'
All that testosterone drives the "Man Trance"-- that glazed-eye look a man gets when he sees breasts (or scientifically, Peepatpectoralust). As a woman who was among the ranks of the early feminists, I wish I could say that men can stop themselves from entering this trance. But the truth is, they can't. Here comes the long-winded non sequitur. During a spirited lunch time discussion with coworkers (2 male, 2 female), the long term effects of acknowledging the existence of the “Man Trance” were discussed. The men initially saw this as a positive and revolutionary step for the advancement of inter-gender communication. Finally, women would comprehend us, thus eliminating all the heartburn and headache associated with trying to make women understand; but of course, it took a woman to point out the potential pitfalls of such a development. Our own brains can be used against us! She suggested that all a woman has to do to gain political, social and economic power over a man is approach him and stick out her boobs, instantly inducing a “Man Trance,” rendering the male completely helpless. Rather than being seen as a demeaning and objectifying gesture, the boob attack would become the ultimate weapon in turning the world on its head by allowing women to gain control of the Universe. Let me tell you, this did not sound very appealing to us guys! Their visual brain circuits are always on the lookout for fertile mates. Whether or not they intend to pursue a visual enticement, they have to check out the goods. Ha! I love it. Guys, next time you get caught checking out the goods, your response should be, “Sorry, my visual brain circuits were pursuing visual enticement.” You’ll still probably get slapped, but it’s worth a try.
To a man, this is the most natural response in the world, so he's dismayed by how betrayed his wife or girlfriend feels when she sees him eyeing another woman. I did not write this - a highly educated woman did. Men look at attractive women the way we look at pretty butterflies. They catch the male brain's attention for a second, but then they flit out of his mind. Five minutes later (try 5 hours!), while we're still fuming, he's deciding whether he wants ribs or chicken breast for dinner. He, if married for less than 5 years, asks us, "What's wrong?" We say, "Nothing." He shrugs and turns on the TV. We smolder and fear that he'll leave us for another woman. I had no idea that really worked!
Men look at attractive women the way women look at pretty butterflies. Thanks for another great argument, Louann. Next time your spouse or girlfriend starts smoldering because you were looking at pretty butterflies, tell her, “No need to worry, darling, when’s the last time I had sex with a butterfly?” Not surprisingly, the different objectives that men and women have in mating games put us on opposing teams -- at least at first. The female brain is driven to seek security and reliability ($$$) in a potential mate before she has sex. But a male brain is fueled by booze to mate and mate again (so the Mormons had it right all along!). Until, that is, he mates for life. No, she must be talking about Swans.
Despite stereotypes to the contrary, the male brain can fall in love just as hard and fast as the female brain, and maybe more so. When he meets and sets his sights on capturing "the one," mating with her becomes his prime directive. And when he succeeds (he moves on to “number two, and so on and so forth), his brain makes an indelible imprint of her. Lust and love collide and he's hooked.
The 'Doting Daddy Brain'
A man in hot pursuit of a mate doesn't even remotely resemble a devoted, doting daddy. But that's what his future holds. Don’t tell us that! When his mate becomes pregnant, she'll emit pheromones that will waft into his nostrils, stimulating his brain to make more of a hormone called prolactin. Her pheromones will also cause his testosterone production to drop by 30 percent. Guys, we need to lobby the Pharmaceutical Industry to develop an antidote to prolactin!!!!!! These hormonal changes make him more likely to help with the baby. They also change his perceptual circuitry (I already have booze to do this, why do I need prolactin?), increasing his ability to hear a baby cry, something many men can't do very well before their wives are pregnant. And with good reason!!
And a word to the wise for all the young mothers who are reluctant to let your husbands hold and care for your newborn. The more hands-on care a father gives his infant, the more his brain aligns with the role of fatherhood. So, hand over the baby. AAARRGGGHHHHHHH!!
His emotions run deep
Although men have earned the reputation for being more stoic than women, they actually have stronger emotional reactions than we do. They just don't show it very often. She lies! How could she possibly know this? She’s a woman!!
The male brain can fall in love just as hard and fast as the female brain, and maybe more so.
Studies of men's faces show that the male brains initial emotional reaction can be stronger than the female brain's. But within 2.5 seconds, he changes his face to hide the emotion, or even reverse it. The repeated practice of hiding his emotions gives men the classic poker face. Wrong, wrong, wrong on this one Louann. These behaviors are performed by men to make women think that men have deep feelings. I can assure you that those 2.5 seconds are spent thinking about visual enticement.
It's his poker face and his analytical response to personal problems that can put him in the doghouse. Correction. Any act on his part, be it trivial or innocuous, can get him in the doghouse; it’s all dependent on the mood of his woman. She's crying as she talks about what's wrong with the relationship, and instead of hugging her, his mind is racing to find a way to resolve the problem as soon as possible. Well, she got this half right. His mind is racing… to figure out a way to end the conversation ASAFP so that it can get back to thinking about what it should be thinking about – visual enticement. With practice and because of the way their brains are wired, men use their analytical brain structures, not their emotional ones, to find a solution.
They enjoy this advantage, but women often take affront to it. Why do women always feel affronted when men enjoy an advantage over them?? When you're telling your husband your problem and he tries to solve it instead of hearing you out, you may think he's being insensitive. But that's not what's going on in his brain. He's working to solve the problem so he can (end the conversation ASAFP) relieve your pain as quickly as possible. Not because he doesn't care or doesn't want to listen, but because he loves you. Yeah, that’s it sweetie.
'Lovable Grandpas' and 'Grumpy Old Men'
As men age, the male brain hormones change and the male brain and body goes into the stage of life called andropause. The king of male hormones -- testosterone -- goes down and the queen of female hormones -- estrogen -- goes up. Lies, lies and more lies!! She failed to mention ‘Dirty Old Men’ who are no different from young men if you discount the age difference. Whether Grandpa is your kids' hero or the grouch they hate to visit depends a lot on how he handles these hormonal changes. For example, if his testosterone levels drop to an abnormally low level, he can feel tired, irritable and even depressed – in other words, like a woman!. Some men in this condition seek hormone replacement therapy and others (real men) find relief in exercise, more frequent sex, and spending more time with other people.
· Whether Grandpa is your kids' hero or the grouch they hate to visit depends a lot on how he handles these hormonal changes.
The grandpa that kids can't wait to see is the one who's feeling the effects of the hormone oxytocin, often called the "cuddle hormone." I’m pretty sure oxytocin is found in beer. He's fun and playful and likes to hear what his grandchildren have to say. He's much more patient with your children than he was with you, when you were growing up. Everyone knows it’s easier to be patient with kids you can send away at the end of a long day without any legal repercussions. The love circuits of the mature male brain can be hijacked by his grandkids, even more than they were by his own children. That just sounds so wrong.
The 'Lonely Hearts Club'
Not only is the mature male (oxymoron) brain more receptive to closer bonds, but it's also more sensitive to loneliness. Nobody thrives when they're lonely, but it seems to take a major toll on older men. Sixty-five percent of divorces in couples over the age of 60 are initiated by women, leaving their husbands shell-shocked and devastated. This is the untold story about why middle aged men divorce their wives to be with younger women – they know what’s coming once they hit sixty so they’re simply making a preemptive strike.
Once his wife leaves, unless he makes a point of socializing more with other people, his brain stops getting the social workout it needs to make him feel good about himself. Simply not true. He still has the right to purchase alcohol and his two hands. If he becomes a loner, his social-approval circuits don't get activated. In brain scan studies of older males researchers have found that the brain's pleasure and reward areas, the VTA and the NAC, remain more active in men who are social. So don't begrudge the divorcee or the new widower some socializing and seeking female companionship. Finally some good advice again.
The bottom line
The male human brain is the best learning machine on the planet and male human beings are capable of making major changes in our lives. But there are some things that the male brain and female brain are not likely to change anytime soon. And it makes more sense to deal with these brain realities, than to argue with them or ignoring them.
The best advice I have for women is make peace with the male brain. Let men be men. Hallelujah Sister. Amen to that!
Believe The Captain when he exhorts: Men – prepare to do battle! Women – take out your weapons!
Yours…Los-ing…the…bat-tle…
The…Cap-tain
